Always check in with your sex partner

We all want to be having amazing sex, let’s start out right by agreeing this. We are all on the same page, and when 2 people come together to have sex (or sometimes more than two people!) they both have the same *shared* outcome – a desire to come hard, a desire for amazing sex. So given that they both want the same thing, they are both in the right place to be helping both themselves and the other person achieve what they want. This means that if asked for help, they *will* help. That is an important place to start this article, because we are going to be asking you to talk to your sexual partner in order to improve your sex life here.

So you have just met someone and it is early days. You are trying to work out what they like and they don’t like, what is turning them on and what is a bucket of water. The easiest way to do this? Check in with them. You can get a lot of clues by listening to their body and how it responds to your touch, but you can get the clearest answers by listening to their words. Check in with them, ask them if what you are doing is good, and they will surely tell you – and be grateful that you asked!

So you have been together for some time, you have been through the basic routines, and you are thinking about mixing it up, trying something new or different. Just because you know what they already like, doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t do something new and different – quite the opposite. You are a bit unsure if it is a good idea, if they will like it... check in with them! Just as you are doing it, ask, and you will receive.

So you have now been with the same person for a couple of years. You have really felt each other out in terms of sex (by feeling each other up!) and you know what s/he likes. You *know* it... well guess what. Things change, and what worked two years ago may not now, so check in with your partner. If you want to have continuous long term amazing sex you have to be checking in for your whole sex life – or your sex life will die a death.
So, be sure to talk to your partner, don’t get complacent and don’t allow routine to kill what could be a great sex life. Instead, a simple check in can keep it all alive.